The old man and the lawnmower

There was an old man who had a strange pet.
It was a lawnmower which he named Fred.
Its tail was a cable, its colour red.
He took it with him everywhere he went,
He walked him to the local duck pond,
Where the ducks took fright at such an odd sight.
When Fred was poorly, took it to the vet,
Who was not pleased to see the mower
On her consultation table that day.
She was more used to rabbits, dogs and cats.
She said the old man should see his GP,
But perhaps leave the lawnmower at home.
The old man replied “No!” And that was that.

The old man loved Fred, who loved him too.
They lived happily in a ground floor flat.

The hunter of the air

His wings stretch far,

Skimming the sun’s rays

As he searches for prey.

Majestically he glides

On currents of warm air,

While those far below

Are transfixed by his stare.

Suddenly, he spots his prey.

Down, down he swoops,

Frighteningly fast,

Lest it make its escape.

 

It never had a chance

Against a bird of such power.

His food is swallowed whole

In a flurry of feathers and claws.

All beware the hunter of the air.

 

“Oi! That’s my chip!

Get lost you stupid gull!”

 

National writing day

It’s national writing day today. So, stop making excuses and sit down and write for 5 minutes. Write about anything. See what appears. ☺

I am too tired to write anything sensible today,  so I just wrote some silly poems.

I have a headache

And should go to bed

But I am writing

Instead.

The NHS turns 70 soon. If is was a person, who would it be? A lady, naturally grey. Wrinkled. Matronly, but steeley underneath. Loves like a grandma but fights for her family like a ninja queen.

I press letters on my phone

And hope that a poem will appear.

It doesn’t.

I blame brexit.

Paddington Bear has an adventure in London.

Paddington Bear at Monument Tube 12042018
Hello, I am Paddington Bear. Today, some humans called Mike and Alex bought me from a shop in London, and took me on an adventure. I have always lived up on a shelf in the shop, so had never seen London properly before. Just a lot of tourists’ heads.

Mike and P Bear on tube 12042018
We went on the tube, which is an underground train network! Even though we were underground, I didn’t see any earthworms or mud. I sat on Mike’s shoulder for a good view.

London Eye 11042018
We went on a boat ride on the Thames. It was so cool: we saw lots of things, like this big wheel. I think that people who have been very naughty are made to go on it, as punishment.

20180412_113315_Richtone(HDR)
My owners took me up a ridiculously tall building, called the Shard. I was too scared to get out of Alex’s backpack. Bears are Not made to be this high up! Afterwards, I needed a cuddle and some marmalade sandwiches to recover.

Paddington Bear on bench 12042018
I got tired from all the adventuring and needed a sit-down, and look what we found! A bench with my name on it. What are the chances?

Paddington Bear at Paddington Underground station
There is a tube station named after me! How cool is that? 

20180412_134554_Richtone(HDR)
Then we went to a very noisy and busy train station. I like London, but there are just too many people. I found this extremely old bear, who told me all about Peru, which is where us Paddingtons all came from many years ago. He is very popular: I saw lots of people getting their photo with him.

 

Paddington Bear shop London 12042018
We found an awesome shop, full of bears just like me! I made lots of friends. They are all hoping for families to take them home. Living in a shop can be quite boring. Except for the parties after closing-time, of course.

Paddington Bear on train to Swindon 12042018
Mike, Alex and I got on a train, heading for Swindon, which is where cool people live, so I hear. I read a book.

Me and PBear on train from London to Swindon 1204
Alex let me sit on her shoulder for a while. Trains are interesting. There was a man on his phone though, talking about business for the whole journey. I felt very sleepy and had a quick nap. When I woke up, we were in Swindon.

B cuddling PBear from behind
Mike and Alex took me to their home. I have a new owner called Bethany, who loves me very much. She makes me marmalade sandwiches every day. ☺

Mr Bumblebee

Look at Mr Bumblebee,
He’s such a handsome fellow.
So proud and smart and stripy:
Ventablack and fire yellow.
A distinctly busy chap,
Always working, never stops.
He has an internal map,
Which means he never gets lost.
See him flying everywhere,
Doing an important job.
Never resting on a chair,
No-one could call him a slob.
With the arrival of spring,
He works overtime all day.
Tirelessly on the wing,
No time to enjoy his pay.
Dear Mr Bumblebee,
You have earned a little rest.
Sit with me and drink honey,
Taste the fruits of your success.
Mr Bumblebee drawing